5岁男孩不想上学，妈妈干脆带他捡了一天垃圾！结果亮了…
<p style="max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;line-height: 25.6px;white-space: normal;text-align: center;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><span style="max-width: 100%;color: #888888;font-size: 15px;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><br style="max-width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"/></span></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;">最近泰国的一位妈妈火了，因为5岁的儿子一大早就闹着不想上学，而且她和丈夫又怎么劝都没用……</span></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;">这场面是不是很熟悉？咱们也都遇到过不止一回吧？</span></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;">可是，这位泰国妈妈的处理方式很不一样。</span></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><strong style="max-width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;">她干脆帮孩子请假一天，带他去捡垃圾！</span></strong></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><br style="max-width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"/></span></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><img class="" data-copyright="0" data-ratio="1.3333333333333333" data-s="300,640" src="data/attachment/forum/201802/23/144824xomll8p5rllb5mne.jpg" data-type="jpeg" data-w="720" style="box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;visibility: visible !important;width: auto !important;" width="auto"/></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><br style="max-width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"/></span></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;">他们沿着马路去捡塑料瓶，开始的时候这孩子还挺兴奋，可是没过多久就喊累了。</span></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;">但是妈妈仍然坚定地带着他走了<strong style="max-width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;">3.5公里</strong>，捡了一小袋空瓶子，换了<strong style="max-width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;">2泰铢</strong>（约合人民币0.4元）。</span></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><br style="max-width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"/></span></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><img class="" data-copyright="0" data-ratio="1.3333333333333333" data-s="300,640" src="data/attachment/forum/201802/23/144824xz6dexx1xqx6w6xw.jpg" data-type="jpeg" data-w="720" style="font-size: 16px;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;visibility: visible !important;width: auto !important;" width="auto"/></span></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><br style="max-width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"/></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;">就算只赚了2泰铢，孩子也很高兴。</span></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;">不过他还是表示，走不动了。</span></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;">他说：“妈妈，我们可以坐公交车回家吗？”</span></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;">妈妈：“坐公交车一个人要10泰铢，你有钱吗？”</span></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><br style="max-width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"/></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><img class="" data-copyright="0" data-ratio="1.3333333333333333" data-s="300,640" src="data/attachment/forum/201802/23/144824dakqysww8fqqsfxd.jpg" data-type="jpeg" data-w="720" style="box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;visibility: visible !important;width: auto !important;" width="auto"/></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><br style="max-width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"/></span></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;">没有办法，他只好跟妈妈一起往回走，这个时候，看到了冰淇淋店</span></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;">孩子：“妈妈，我想吃冰淇淋。”</span></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;">妈妈：“冰淇淋要5泰铢，我们钱够吗？”</span></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><br style="max-width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"/></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;">又走了一段路之后，到了餐厅门口</span></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;">孩子：“妈妈，我想吃燕麦。”</span></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;">妈妈：“去买吗？15泰铢。”</span></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;">孩子：“妈妈，我钱不够，我要回家。”</span></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;">妈妈：“累了？”</span></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><strong style="max-width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;">儿子：“好累，好热，<span style="max-width: 100%;color: #D92142;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;">我想上学</span>，我要回家。”</span></strong></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;">……</span></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><br style="max-width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"/></span></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;">这位妈妈在文章最后表示：为了让孩子顺利成长，需要让他们感受幸福，也需要了解痛苦和疲惫，了解一切的来之不易<br style="max-width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"/></span></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><br style="max-width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"/><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"></span></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><img class="" data-copyright="0" data-ratio="1.25" data-s="300,640" src="data/attachment/forum/201802/23/144824d4f4x3y4y1vkta19.jpg" data-type="jpeg" data-w="768" style="box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;visibility: visible !important;width: auto !important;" width="auto"/></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;text-align: center;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 14px;color: #888888;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;">就是这个妈妈</span></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;text-align: center;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 14px;color: #888888;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><br style="max-width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"/></span></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;">现在咱们来分析一下，这个妈妈做对了什么呢？没有念叨100遍，没有说到口干舌燥，没有上火发飙，孩子竟然自己就改了！</span></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><br style="max-width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"/></span></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;">其实，儿童心理学奠基人Rudolf Dreikurs早有答案，他说：<strong style="max-width: 100%;color: rgb(217, 33, 66);box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;">“如果真的想改变孩子的行为，家长需要用行动，而不是语言。”</strong></span><br style="max-width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"/></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><br style="max-width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"/></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;color: #000000;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><strong style="max-width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><span style="max-width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;">简单说，就是行动起来，别啰嗦，别念叨。</span></strong></span></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><br style="max-width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"/></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;">他在《孩子：挑战》一书中，对这个观点做了详细讲解，还介绍了妈妈们常见的四种无用的“念叨”，非常经典，也很有意思。</span></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><br style="max-width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"/></span></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;">我重新做了提炼和总结，分享给大家。</span></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><br style="max-width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"/></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;text-align: center;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><span style="max-width: 100%;color: #7A4FD6;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><strong style="max-width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><span style="max-width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;">一、“讲道理型”念叨</span></strong></span></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><br style="max-width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"/></span></p><blockquote style="max-width: 100%;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;line-height: 25.6px;white-space: normal;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;color: #888888;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;">妈妈从厨房窗户看八岁儿子布莱恩，正在用玩具气枪瞄准邻居的窗子。她叫道：“布莱恩，过来，我有话跟你说。”布莱恩把枪放下，慢慢走过来。妈妈把他带到工作间，让他坐在高脚椅上，自己坐在椅子上说：“亲爱的，你知道的，我们给你玩具气枪时教过你，它有危险。而且我们在地下游戏室里专门给你设了一个射击间，在那里玩没问题，不会伤到人或者打破东西。对吗？”</span></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><br style="max-width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"/></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;color: #888888;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;">布莱恩睁大眼睛看着妈妈，一脸无辜，虽然他看起来对这次谈话很有兴趣，却什么也不回答。妈妈问：“你知道玩具气枪可能会打破别人家的窗户吗？” 孩子只是扬了扬眉毛。</span></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><br style="max-width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"/></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;color: #888888;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;">妈妈又说：“你想想，宝贝，这些子弹出膛的时候很有力量，如果真的瞄准了，肯定会把窗户打烂。你并不想这样做，不是吗？”布莱恩垂下眼晴，依然不说话。</span></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><br style="max-width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"/></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;color: #888888;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;">“总之，宝贝，你知道如果你打烂了别人家的窗户，我们就得赔人家钱。你并不希望这样的事情发生，对吧？”布莱恩看了看妈妈，还是什么都不说。</span></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><br style="max-width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"/></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;color: #888888;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;">“那你现在要不要去地下游戏室的射击间玩？我想那里肯定好玩。”布莱恩点点头，晃悠着双脚说：“我想去外面玩。”“好的，儿子，但是枪要留在屋子里，好不好？”“好吧。”布莱恩不情愿地耸了耸肩。</span></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><br style="max-width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"/></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;color: #888888;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;">几天后，妈妈又发现布莱恩在很近的距离射击瓶子和铁罐。</span></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><br style="max-width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"/></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;color: #888888;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;">她又把他叫进屋，讲了一通道理。妈妈重复了一遍怎样小心用玩具枪、射击的危险等。布莱恩又一次做出认真听的样子。妈妈又一次让他把枪留在屋子里，然后去外面玩。</span></p></blockquote><p style="margin: 0em 1em 20px;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><br style="max-width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"/>在这个例子中，妈妈本着“和孩子讲道理”态度，一再跟孩子说道理。</span></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em 20px;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;">虽然布莱恩表面上在听，但实际上，他没有任何改变的意愿，对妈妈的说教一点都没有放在心上，<span style="max-width: 100%;color: #D92142;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;">“选择性”失聪。</span></span></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;">当我们发现孩子”不听我们的话“时，如果继续采用说的方式，其实都是在白费力气。</span></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><br style="max-width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"/></span></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><strong style="max-width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;">讲道理没有用，又不能打，那妈妈能做什么呢？</span></strong></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><strong style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 16px;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><span style="max-width: 100%;letter-spacing: 1px;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><br style="max-width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"/></span></strong></span></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><span style="max-width: 100%;color: #D92142;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><strong style="max-width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;">妈妈可以行动</span></strong></span><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;">——她可以把玩具气枪拿走。“我很遗憾你不愿服从规则，等你服从时就可以把枪拿回去。”这样做一两次之后，如果布莱恩仍然阳奉阴违，玩具气枪就应该被收起来，<strong style="max-width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;">不用多说话。</strong></span></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><strong style="max-width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><br style="max-width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"/></strong></span></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;text-align: center;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><span style="max-width: 100%;color: #7A4FD6;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><strong style="max-width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;">2.“吓唬型”念叨</span></strong></span></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><strong style="max-width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><br style="max-width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"/></strong></span></p><blockquote style="max-width: 100%;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;line-height: 25.6px;white-space: normal;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;color: #888888;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;">晚宴后，妈妈让珍妮特回房间睡觉。</span></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><br style="max-width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"/></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;color: #888888;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;">“珍妮特，把睡衣提起来，这样子踩着裤脚，你会摔倒的。该上楼睡觉了。”</span></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;color: #888888;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><br style="max-width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"/></span></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;color: #888888;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;">妈妈接着转身对客人解释，“这件睡衣对她来说长了点，我本来打算明年再给她穿，但你们知道收小孩子就是喜欢新东西，她非穿不可。”</span></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><br style="max-width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"/></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;color: #888888;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;">大家看着仍然站在楼梯上的小姑娘，她开心地向每个人微笑。她向下瞟了一眼自己被睡衣盖隹的双脚，把脚抬起来绕圈，看着睡衣裤脚垂下来跟着绕回，非常好玩。她脸上带着恶作剧般的笑容，再抬起眼睛看看大家。</span></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><br style="max-width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"/></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;color: #888888;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;">妈妈再一次命令她：“珍妮特，请你把睡衣裤脚提高点，不然你会被绊倒的。快点到楼上去！”小姑娘慢慢转过身，慢慢地走上一级楼梯，又转身，朝着大家看。</span></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><br style="max-width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"/></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;color: #888888;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;">妈妈这时背对着她，她听了一会儿大人说话，然后坐在楼梯上，伸长两条腿，让睡衣裤脚来回摆动。</span></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;color: #888888;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><br style="max-width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"/></span></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;color: #888888;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;">妈妈看到客人在笑，转过身来：“珍妮特！你想摔下来是不是？现在马上提起来，上楼去。卡尔（孩子爸爸），你来把珍妮特带上楼。”</span></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><br style="max-width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"/></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;color: #888888;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;">珍妮特一听，立刻转身迅速爬上楼梯，毫不在乎长长的裤脚，在爸爸出现以前进了卧室。</span></p></blockquote><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><br style="max-width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"/></span></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;">在这个例子里，<strong style="max-width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;">妈妈说得太多了，</strong>而她所做的始终是用语言和危险恐吓孩子。</span></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><br style="max-width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"/></span></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em 20px;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;">其实，珍妮特知道应该把睡衣怎么办，她只是故意表现出她不知道危险的存在而已。</span></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;">这样，睡衣和妈妈都在她的控制之下。她利用这个机会把妈妈的关注从朋友那里拉到了自己身上。而妈妈的反应也都在珍妮特的预料之中。</span></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><br style="max-width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"/></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><strong style="max-width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;">很多情况下，父母要做的，就是保持沉默。</span></strong></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><br style="max-width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"/></span></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;">虽然，我们第一次尝试用沉默的方式时，会觉得很困难，觉得面临这样的挑战，必须说点什么！</span></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><br style="max-width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"/></span></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;">但是，很快我们就会发现，沉默不但可以减轻当时情形的紧张和压力，还能重新让家庭气氛恢复和谐。</span></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><br style="max-width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"/></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;">妈妈可以对珍妮特的睡衣只字不提。她要做的是果断采取行动，让孩子选择自己去睡觉，或者让爸爸或妈妈送她去睡觉。</span></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><br style="max-width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"/></span></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;text-align: center;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><span style="max-width: 100%;color: #7A4FD6;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><strong style="max-width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;">3.“行为与语言不一致”念叨</span></strong></span></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;text-align: center;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;letter-spacing: 1px;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><br style="max-width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"/></span></p><blockquote style="max-width: 100%;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;line-height: 25.6px;white-space: normal;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;color: #888888;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;">在学校门口，五岁的特里站在角落里大哭。妈妈又哄又劝又威胁：“别哭了，宝贝······如果你再哭，我就走了，你一个人在这儿哭吧。”可是孩子哭得声音更大了。</span></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><br style="max-width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"/></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><span style="max-width: 100%;color: #888888;font-size: 15px;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;">“现在我真的走了。” 妈妈说。特里听到，尖叫着跑到门口去追妈妈。妈妈已经走到大门口，但听到特里尖利的哭声，又折返回来：“嘿，特里，你需要留在教室里，别哭了。”</span></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;color: #888888;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><br style="max-width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"/></span></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;color: #888888;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;">老师这时介入了：“特里妈妈，你尽快离开就好了，特里会没事的。”“我怕他离开学校。我们从家来这里的时候，他就挺麻烦的。”“我相信，特里准备好了就会加入我们的。特里，我很乐意看到你和我们一起玩，记得吗？我们是朋友哦。”</span></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><br style="max-width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"/></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;color: #888888;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;">妈妈离开了，特里很快就不哭了。在角落里待了一会儿后，就决定加入大家。</span></p></blockquote><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><br style="max-width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"/></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;">在这个例子中，妈妈面对孩子尖叫、失控，感到非常的无助。</span><strong style="max-width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;">她试图用语言威胁给孩子施压，让孩子听话，但她的行为却与她的语言相反。</span></strong></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><br style="max-width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"/></span></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;">她想让孩子停止大哭，却不知道自己应该采取行动，离开这个环境。孩子这时的哭只是“泪水压力”而已，不用太过在意。</span></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><br style="max-width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"/></span></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;text-align: center;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><strong style="max-width: 100%;color: rgb(122, 79, 214);font-size: 16px;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;">4.“无效就放弃”的念叨</span></strong></span></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><br style="max-width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"/></span></p><blockquote style="max-width: 100%;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;line-height: 25.6px;white-space: normal;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;color: #888888;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;">五岁的乔治爬过超市里的购物车，从栏杆上滑下来，坐在旋转栏杆门上。“乔治，赶快下来！你会受伤的。”</span></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;color: #888888;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><br style="max-width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"/></span></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;color: #888888;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;">乔治不理会妈妈，弯着膝盖，倒挂在栏杆上面。“乔治，下来，你会受伤的！”</span></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;color: #888888;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><br style="max-width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"/></span></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;color: #888888;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;">妈妈拉出一辆推车。小男孩直起身坐在栏杆上，爬下来，又爬上推车。“乔治，走啦！”妈妈说完就去购物了。乔治在栏杆、旋转栅栏门上一直玩到妈妈买完东西准备离开。</span></p></blockquote><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><span style="max-width: 100%;letter-spacing: 1px;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><br style="max-width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"/></span></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;">在这个例子里，刚开始妈妈以为用语言就可以制止孩子，可谁知，<span style="max-width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;">乔治在做“妈妈的聋子”，根本不理会，妈妈也就放弃了。</span></span></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><br style="max-width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"/></span></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><span style="max-width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;">下次</span>再发生类似情况，妈妈继续讲道理，孩子继续不听。如此，形成恶心循环，对孩子行为规范没有一点好处。</span></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><br style="max-width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"/></span></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;">要想从这样的困境中走出来，我们必须学会用行动代替语言。<span style="max-width: 100%;color: #D92142;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><strong style="max-width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;">我们需要记住一个座右铭：发生冲突时，不用语言，用行动。</strong></span></span></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><br style="max-width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"/></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;">在他们去超市之前，妈妈可以说：“乔治，超市不是游乐场。”当乔治胡闹时，妈妈可以温柔而坚定地牵起他的手，一起回到自己的车里：“对不起，如果你不能再超市里行为恰当，我们就回家，不买东西了。”</span></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><br style="max-width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"/></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><strong style="max-width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;">用这样坚定的行为，妈妈可以向乔治表达她的认真态度。</span></strong></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><br style="max-width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"/></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><strong style="max-width: 100%;text-align: center;color: rgb(122, 79, 214);font-size: 16px;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;">总结</span></strong></span></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;">怎么样？从这四个例子当中，把握到了用行动而不用语言的精髓了吗？知道为什么“能动手就别叨叨”了吧？</span></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><br style="max-width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"/></span></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;">其实，不管是耐心劝说的妈妈也好，还是恐吓孩子的妈妈也好，出发点都是为了孩子好，希望孩子不要去做那些危险的事情。</span></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><br style="max-width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"/></span></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><strong style="max-width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;">可是，孩子有时就是这样，Ta的行为意志并不会因为我们大人的担心而发生改变，他有自己的想法，自己的目的。</span></strong></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><br style="max-width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"/></span></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><strong style="max-width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;color: #D92142;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;">如果我们无法用语言去改变孩子，那么，应该像那位泰国妈妈似的，采取行动！</span></strong></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><strong style="max-width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><br style="max-width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"/></span></strong></p><p style="margin: 0em 1em;max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 2em;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><strong style="max-width: 100%;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;"><span style="max-width: 100%;font-size: 15px;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;">虽然，给孩子的爱是无条件的，但是，我们也应该要孩子明白，爱Ta并不代表没有规则。</span></strong></p><p><br/></p><p style="max-width: 100%; min-height: 1em; color: rgb(62, 62, 62); font-size: 16px; white-space: normal; line-height: 25.6px; background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255); box-sizing: border-box !important; word-wrap: break-word !important; text-align: center;"><img src="data/attachment/forum/201802/23/144931gh0yvpysylltyy6t.png" alt="_20180214104030.png" aid="attachimg_636202"/></p><p style="max-width: 100%;min-height: 1em;color: rgb(62, 62, 62);font-size: 16px;white-space: normal;line-height: 25.6px;box-sizing: border-box !important;word-wrap: break-word !important;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);"><br/></p>
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